Today our guest is the creator of Talk Sex with Me Tara Spears. In this episode, Tara talks about the difficulties of talking about sex with teenagers, the importance of knowing your own values and reasons why parents themselves may struggle to talk about sex with their teenagers.
Ms. Spears graduated with a Master’s Degree in Counselor Education from the University of Central Florida in 2005. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified Sex Therapist. She has over ten years of experience working with individuals, children, families, and couples encountering a variety of hardships in life. After spending most of her career responding reactively to situations or intervening after a crisis (i.e. a child’s removal from the home, failed adoption, and the aftermath of abuse), Ms. Spears decided to take a more proactive approach.
In this episode you will learn:
- Tara talks about the difficulties of talking about sex with teenagers
- The importance of knowing your own values
- Reasons why parents themselves may struggle to talk about sex with their teenagers
How sex is a difficult topic for teenagers and parents to communicate about
- Be candid and honest
- If you don’t tell them they will find out somewhere
- Explore your values pertaining to sex and share them with your daughter
- Dealing with sexual behaviors
- Supporting teenagers on their journey through these difficult conversations
Actions parents can take to best guide their teenagers through sex and sexuality
- Some parents go the book route which gives the mechanics, but doesn’t help your teen understanding your values
[spp-tweet tweet=”Listen for those natural opportunities to have organic conversations about sex”]
- Can play a game, like Jeopardy, to discuss sex
- Having conversations with other adults in the teenager’s life
Reasons parents get stuck and can’t talk with their teens about sex
- Parent may be uncomfortable with their own sexuality
- Parent growing up in abusive home
- Family of origin beliefs
- Not needing to have the perfect answers, but needing to engage in conversation
- Parents think if “I talk about it then they will go have sex”
- Do you want your child to gain information outside of your home?
- Doing everything we can to decrease confusion around sex
- How as a parent you have a small window to shape cultural values and views on sex
Details on Tara’s various training programs
Tara’s Information:
Website: https://talksexwithme.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/talksexwme
Other Resources: (Some may be affiliate links)
Robie Harris books It’s Perfectly Normal: Changing Bodies, Growing Up, Sex, and Sexual Health (The Family Library)